Staying out of prison / East Oakland parolee has spent half his life behind bars. Now he's fighting himself and the system to stay clean. Can he finally do it?

Jason B. Johnson, Chronicle Staff Writer

Monday, December 30, 2002

Antaun Williams has spent half of his 34 years in prison, including a five-year stint for carjacking and kidnapping. Two months ago, he was released for the fifth -- and he hopes last -- time.

And this time, he's asked for the help he didn't seek the other four times. He enrolled in a new program in Oakland that is showing success in helping ex-cons find work, a place to live and support from the community -- and avoid the common route back to prison.

Before his parole on Oct. 15, Williams avoided other convicts out of fear that they could pick a fight or plant contraband in his cell. And he wondered how he would get by on the outside, as parolees get only $200 and the clothes on their backs when they walk out.

When he got out, he returned to his old neighborhood in East Oakland. For two weeks, he hunkered down in his family home trying to avoid the friends and places that always seemed to lead to trouble. But eventually he had to go outside, to the store or to try to see his 10-year-old son.

That's when he ran into his old buddies -- and temptation. After years of dreaming about freedom, he fell back on the same habits -- accepting a drink or a puff from a joint. He was flirting with getting caught again.

But this time, Williams, one of about 3,000 parolees in Oakland, went to his probation officer and pleaded for help. And this time, the city and state are offering services and peer support in a new program aimed at helping ex-cons get housing and jobs -- and avoiding going back to prison.

"The first year is very important," said Shirley Poe, East Bay District administrator for the state Department of Corrections. "(And) the first 90 days are crucial in a person's parole adjustment."

Early indications suggest Oakland's Parole Orientation program has helped to keep parolees from going back to prison since it was launched in October 1999.

In 1998, 57.7 percent of those in Oakland were returned to prison, according to a California Department of Corrections study, and that increased the next year to 58.9 percent. In 2000, the trend went the other way -- declining to 52 percent.

"It's an important program," said Oakland Mayor Jerry Brown, an enthusiastic supporter of the orientation effort.

"Despite the fact that millions are spent every year locking people up, nothing is spent on blending them back into (society)," Brown said. "The results are predictable."

On Nov. 6, Williams was placed into Allied Fellowship Service, a halfway house that's part of the city's transitional services network.

"I begged my probation officer to bring me here," said Williams. "He had no idea of what I was doing."

Williams will live there until April 23, when he must have a residence of his own and a job to support himself. Until early January, he will live under strict supervision at the halfway house and attend an all-day class once a week on employment, anger management and other life skills.

The sessions, which are often peppered with jokes and laughter, let Williams and others talk about the decisions and conditions in their lives that led to their imprisonment.

"Some of us was conditioned to think selling drugs was right," a young man said at one session. His comment drew several nods, and prompted another parolee to say: "I was conditioned to believe there wasn't nuthin' out there for me."

The Allied program offers a tightly structured environment. Williams must sign in and out of the facility, detailing where he will be and what he will be doing throughout the day.

In his free time, Williams gets visits from his family, including a brother who came by to play chess one day. He often uses the exercise machines in the back yard, or talks to the friends he's made among the other parolees -- including one who has been sent back behind bars.

Williams and fellow parolee Richard Harrison both were battling to overcome addictions -- Williams to cocaine and Harrison to heroin. They worked out, talked over a smoke outside the house and sat together during class sessions.

"I'm a six-time loser," Harrison, 44, said of himself one day, listing how many times he'd been in and out of prison. His words drew an understanding nod from Williams. "If I catch a felony, I'm spending the rest of my life in prison," Williams said.

Earlier this month, Williams was told that Harrison had been arrested for allegedly driving a stolen car and was sitting in Santa Rita jail.

Harrison told officials at Allied that he had bought the car for $500 and didn't know it was stolen. A hearing in his case is scheduled soon.

SEEING FAILURES FIRST-HAND

Since Williams came to Allied house, four men have had their parole revoked,

and one has died. "He got a big check and disappeared one day," said Williams.

"They found him in a hotel room. A blood vessel in his brain had ruptured from cocaine use."

Williams is trying to use the negative things he's seen as inspiration to stay on track, especially when things aren't going well -- like the day he spent three hours at the Department of Motor Vehicles to get a new ID and sign up for a driver's test.

This is the longest he's stayed sober in years. It's led Williams to do things that surprise himself and members of his family.

One day he had some extra cash, so he bought some flowers for his mother. For Thanksgiving he went and helped his mother prepare dinner, then visited with his family and girlfriend that evening.

Even though Williams has come a long way, he still gets the occasional urge to go out and get high.

"I equate fun with getting high," Williams said, shaking his head.

At those times it's good to have resources nearby he can rely on. A major test will be when Williams starts working and gets his own place, and must deal with the everyday stresses that come with life.

Williams wants to take additional courses and learn to drive a big rig -- and get a job.

"I'm fighting for my life," Williams said of his effort to stay clean and transition back into society. "I approach every day like that."

http://www.sfgate.com/default/article/Staying-out-of-prison-East-Oakland-parolee-has-2742469.php