Reviewed on: October 07,2015

I'm the victim in my husband's case. What do I got to do to drop the charges? I don't want him to be in jail. We have a new baby on the way I already told them some classes and probation would be best. But with the zero tolerance on domestic violence I feel like what I say doesn't even matter. He is a changed man and I do believe in him. What do I do?

Asked: June 25,2015
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It is our experience and opinion that domestic violence cases do not get better in a couple of weeks. Offenders who have to cool down behind bars become remorseful in a hurry. They will say anything, make all kinds of promises to get released. They will be fine for a while - but whatever their triggers were in the past are going to reappear in the future. If it is alcohol or drugs, it will DEFINITELY happen again. Treatment is one component, but their willingness to change is the other. This takes months and months for this change to actually take hold. Our advice is to take this time apart and find yourself. Don't just think about the good times, think about your safety and your unborn child's safety. The only way a victim wants to place themselves back into the path of domestic violence is with some unhealthy bond maybe co-dependency. Please do not rush to find a way to release him before certain actions to help him mentally have been put in place, take a long look at what has happened. You should try and find someone who is an expert in this field and speak frankly with them. This is far too serious for your future well-being to just jump back into the fire without a support plan in place.
Accepted Answer Date Created: June 26,2015