yes and yes :)... but seriously, there are not many facilities that allow conjugal visits anymore. phone sex sounds great, but it's frustrating because you don't have much privacy at the phone bank... try a sexy letter and selfies  

It's actually easier when you know someone is waiting for you when you get out

These are tough decisions that no one can make for you. You have to weigh all of the good and all of the bad and make the hard choice. You already know what to do, but you fear the future and how things will work out in your life. have faith in yourself. Staying in a bad relationship is the opposite.

He might have lost some privileges and didn't cancel on his own, OR, the facility might be on lockdown and all visits are suspended for awhile

If you are relaying messages from your inmate to people on the outside that further commit a crime on the information you passed, then you could be looking at some serious charges. If you are making calls on behalf of other inmates, it's not a crime but it might jam up your inmate or others inside for circumventing the rules if they somehow find out.

She is a captive audience at the moment, so to speak...;) All you can do is be yourself and take your best shot, you won't have a better opportunity than right now when she has time on her hands.

That might also be referred to as a "conjugal visit" where a spouse can have a sexual encounter with their related inmate but this is only available in four state prison systems, California, Connecticut, New York, and Washington. I will say that I saw a lot of sexual activity in the visiting room where the guards are lax, not paying attention, or are paid to look the other way.

Inmates need hope. The hope of something better or different than the life that led them to the charges that sent them to prison. If you know what their interests are, you could introduce them to magazines and/or books that are mailed into the facility from the publisher. You could write them uplifting letters. Urge them to embrace optimistic thinking and focusing on how to re-invent themselves for a successful re-entry.

could be a similar name? or could be that they were moved? ...and the age thing is usually accurate since the data comes from the jails and prisons.

Don't let your imagination run away with you. Inmates sometimes pick a fight to see if you'll stay with them... because can't account for you on the outside, the fight is a test to see if you'll go on without them. He can't do anything about what you're doing. Sometimes his imagination might get the better of him.