Yes, and you should go in with clear eyes about it. First, stop trying to entertain him around the clock. It is not possible, and more importantly, it is not your job. What is happening right now is a test, whether conscious or not. He is gauging what you will do for him, how far you will stretch, how much guilt you will carry. That dynamic is extremely common when someone is incarcerated, and it does not mean he is a...

Both should be fine. White shoes with velcro straps are generally acceptable at federal facilities. The white color requirement exists at many camps and low-security institutions specifically to distinguish inmates from staff, and velcro is often preferred over laces for practical reasons. That said, confirm with the specific facility before you surrender, because each institution has its own property rules and what is allowed can vary. On the inhaler, a documented medical need carries weight. Asthma is a legitimate condition, and facilities...

The 23-hour lockdown is real and it does happen, though it is not universal across every unit. Certain housing situations, whether due to classification, population management, or facility conditions, result in inmates spending the vast majority of the day confined to their cell with only one hour out. It is one of the harder realities of detention center life, particularly in a county facility where overcrowding and staffing shortages are common. On calls, it depends on the specific setup of the...

It adds up faster than most people on the outside expect, and the county jail is one of the most expensive environments an inmate can be in. Phone calls are almost always the biggest drain. County jail phone rates are notoriously high, and without a discount service in place, calls can run several dollars per minute. It is not hard to burn through hundreds of dollars a week on calls alone. In my first month away, my wife spent over $6,000...

Even after you put money on the phone, there are several reasons calls might not be coming through. The most common issue is that your number may not be on his approved call list. Most facilities require inmates to submit a list of approved numbers before any calls can be made. If your number was never added, or was added recently and has not been processed yet, he physically cannot call you regardless of how much money is on the account. The...

Not necessarily. There are a few reasons that message comes up, and another scheduled visit is only one of them. The most common explanation is simply that all the available time slots for that inmate have been booked, either by other approved visitors or by the facility itself for programming, counts, or other scheduled activities. Facilities limit the number of video visits an inmate can have in a given period, and once those slots are filled, the system blocks additional appointments. It...